You say you want to live in the present, to be in the now, to be fully alive to this moment … but how can you be when your body is living in the past?
The non-dual recognition that you are not your body is true. In the clear light of awakeness, you see that you are not your thoughts or feelings or sensations: you see that you are THAT which is untouched and untainted by the passing of form. But it is also true that the body is the outer representative of the inner dimension of consciousness .. and this representation includes your history, all that has been lodged into the hardening of defense, control and fear. Physical form (the body) exists in the slower realm of time and space. Consciousness is free of three-dimensional reality and immediate. Consciousness IS the now, but body is the story. So even in awakening out of the dream of form identification, the body continues to operate with the karma of previously unmet energies .. and if you continue to refuse to meet them after awakening, you cannot be fully present. A conflict is set up, and you flit in and out of the peace of non-dual realization.
When both consciousness and body are awake, then you stop dragging your past into the present-moment experience. Consciousness wakes up when it recognizes itself – through you – as the ground of being. Body wakes up when you have the resolve and humility to meet everything that was previously avoided or denied as part of your human story, even after awakening. When consciousness and body come into alignment, you are a clear and open vessel that does not have to try to be present … you simply ARE because it is your natural innocent state.
So do not confuse the disidentification from body with ignoring the body. Yes, you are NOT the body. But yes, you do have a body and it carries the record of your past. Do the work of unravelling all the energetic knots of history without getting lost in the story, and your body will lighten up and be a reflection of the clear light of consciousness. Emptiness and fullness become one and the same. You are both. The end of conflict. Namaste.