The Ebb and Flow of My Life

For many years, the tide ebbed in my life. The journey was inwards and inwards, in order to discover and rest in that which is deeper and more enduring than the brokenness of this human story.

It took a long time, and a never-ending well of tender patience. I had to be beaten into humility and non-attachment. I had to be forged in the fire of un-doing and un-knowing.

This journey took me into such a silence within, such an innocent way of seeing life, and the “such-ness” of everything became primary.

And now, the tide is flowing. And still there is tenderness, there is silence, and there is not-knowing. But there is an impulse to move outwards, to give every molecule of this human-ness to the world.

Who knows how long this will last? Inevitably, the tide turns inwards again. But “now” is all that can be experienced and known. And this experience now is an outpouring of love and service, of passion and work, of surrender to the “such-ness” of life that is nudging quietly and irrevocably from the inside out.

While the whole thing is experienced as a divine illusion, there is a wholehearted commitment to the play of destiny. Who am I to say “no” to the ebb and flow of life? I am a servant not a master of life. In this way, what comes and what goes is not taken personally. It is all a temporary gift while walking on this earth. And when I stop walking and stop breathing, that will be a gift too .. the blessing of the deepest silence.

3 Comments Add yours

  1. Reblogged this on Poetry of a Non Dual Heart and commented:

    A short post from my extraordinary wife, author and teacher. I bow down to her tenderness, and the way she has embraced her brokenness and transformed it into great blessing and wisdom.
    She is quite something, and our love is the defining thing of my life..It was worth coming to this existence for such a thing..

    Like

  2. Mellie Logan says:

    So beautiful, thank you. And thank you for sharing so personally yesterday, it’s helpful to know more about who “you” are and where you come from in order to more fully see you now. I’m working on our list…

    Hugs, Mellie >

    Liked by 1 person

  3. What a lovely reply from Kavi about his love and recognition for Amoda Maa. I attended her meeting in the fall and felt her love and dedication to serving truth and real heart recognition in others. My love is also given in heart recognition to her. I thank her for coming out and giving herself to the process of awakening for the call and sake of others. I have been doing this work of calling others to their enlightenment for over thirty years. I am so happy that she has come along and is giving of herself to this great purpose. Love, Santosha Ma

    Liked by 1 person

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